The Mystery of the Disappearing Money

STILL IN SHOCK…
The first thing I did when I realized we were in deep financial trouble (after the crying, hair pulling, and the gnashing of the teeth) I decided I had to figure out where all our money was going and how we could turn this around. At that point I did not have much faith that we could turn it around but I began the process anyway.

TRACKING THE MONSTER
Using our debit card for everything was a big, big help in determining where our money went. In years past we would go to the ATM constantly and withdraw cash to use for just about everything. I tried tracking money in those days with no success. But with the debit card record right on the computer I could print it out, develop our spending categories, make a spread sheet on EXCEL, and start unraveling the mystery of the disappearing money.

DARKNESS IS ALWAYS SCARIER THAN THE LIGHT
Wanting to get a real picture of our spending habits I recorded two months’ worth of activity. My categories included: groceries, fast food (where you have it your way and chuck the dishes), dining out (the places where they get testy if you chuck the dishes), mortgage, insurance, utilities, business, medical, school (e.g. lunches, yearbook, trips, etc.), charity, postage and shipping, books (I was surprised at how big this one was), clothing, car, credit cards, entertainment, and household.

WOW!!!!
(One thing I didn’t do then was tally up the amount of interest I was paying. I did this calculation later. It came up to a monthly total of an incredible $445! That translates to $5345 per year. Every year for how long? We are talking a major vacation with that, renovations on our bathroom, a new/used car which we desperately need. Looking at this figure I became outraged at how little of my payment was going toward the debt. Someone was getting rich and it wasn’t me.)

Obviously we had fixed expenses that we had to pay, although we began looking for a cheaper version of all of them.

WHO DO YOU LOVE, BABY?
The next thing I did was to look at what I valued most in my life.

▬First, of course, was my family. It had always worried me that we had no college fund for our daughter. She is bright as a penny, passionate about everything (especially animal rights), and deserves to have the education that will launch her into a happy, fulfilling life.

▬Second, or perhaps tied with first, was the need to keep us in a comfortable home, safe and secure.

▬Third, were our charity donations. I strongly believe in giving, especially when we have little to give. This awards me perspective. For example, we donate fruit to a “home” for families of children needing treatment at our wonderful children’s hospitals. It is similar to the Ronald McDonald House. When we visit we see pictures of the little ones battling cancer, having surgeries, and preemie babies trying to just breathe. It makes me realize how wealthy I am, so thankful for my healthy children and grandchildren. It’s a reminder of what is wonderful in my life. In addition I truly believe that what goes around comes around, although this is not the reason I give.

▬Fourth, I wanted better health, to lose weight, have more energy, and be able to do more. I also did not want to face diseases in the future that I could have prevented.

Then I made a list of what I didn’t want.

▬The top item was debt. Somehow, some way, we were going to get out of debt. And that has become our focus.
•••First we pay the mortgage, the insurance, the utilities, and our donations. We make the minimum payment
to the credit card company.
•••And then we make the priority payments. We pay into the college savings plan.
•••We joined the Y so we could all get healthier.
•••And then we make an extra payment on those credit cards.
•••We canceled the cell phone, but we kept our TV service and our movie subscription.

▬After these priorities are met we use the left over money for food, entertainment and eating out. Sometimes the groceries are very slim but we survive. We stopped dining out and we discovered the dollar menus at the drive-throughs. We started eating $4 and $6 meals—that was for all three of us. No sodas. Usually we don’t order fries (don’t need the calories anyway), but sometimes order one fry and share it. It satisfies our need to eat out occasionally and it has become a fun game to see how creative we can get.

This how we began to get our life back. In time we developed the three tiered program of getting out of debt and realizing our dreams.

THE MALL IS A FLEETING LOVER
I am discovering, day by day, that it’s not about what I can’t do. I had to do a complete mind shift. I mourned quite a bit that I couldn’t buy what I wanted, go out to eat when I was tired or blue, go to the mall and just check out what was on sale. It was very hard for me. I learned, and am now happy about, what I can do. I can love and enjoy my family. I can have a great time on very little money. I can find free stuff all over the place (more on that later.) I can have faith.

NOW HERE’S ONE OF MY FAVORITE FUNNIES:

A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. Their insight may surprise you.
Better to be safe than………………..Punch a 5th grader
Strike while the …………………….Bug is close
It’s always darkest before…………… Daylight Savings Time
Never underestimate the power of……….Termites
Don’t bite the hand that…………….. looks dirty
A miss is as good as a……………….Mr.
You can’t teach an old dog new…………math
If you lie down with dogs, you’ll………stink in the morning
Love all, trust……………………..me
A penny saved is……………………..not much
Two’s company, three’s………………..the Musketeers
Don’t put off till tomorrow what……….you put on to go to bed
Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and…….you have to blow your nose
If at first you don’t succeed………….get new batteries
You get out of something what you………see pictured on the box
When the blind leadeth the blind……….get out of the way
And the favorite:
Better late than…………………….pregnant.
Thanks for reading and please come back.